Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Thirteen Years Ago Today

We were just babies, really! Hardly out of those onesies I referred to yesterday.

I had barely turned twenty. The Professor was newly twenty three. In the New England of my youth, college-edjamicated folks just didn’t do that. I KNOW some eyebrows raised.

But here we are, thirteen years and three kids later. On that day, we were totally convinced that due to the exalted nature of our love, our marriage would remain special and romantic for all time. Now, please take the following at face value: One thing I’ve learned in the past thirteen years is that no relationship is above the need for consistent effort and renewal. Decay and entropy happen – in nature, in relationships. Fighting back requires some of that determination that convinced you what you had was special in the first place. It takes daily choices, a focus on loving rather than on being loved. Often, it requires divine power – the same power that raised Christ from the dead – to move us beyond our selves.

Want to hear one of our secrets to a happy marriage? It’s super deep and groundbreaking, guaranteed to fend off the blahs. It’s a little game we call “YOU’RE A …”

Here’s how it goes.

Scenario A. We’re wandering through a public park.
Me: “That’s an interesting sculpture.”
Him: “YOU’RE an interesting sculpture.”

Scenario B. We’re eating dinner.
Him: “I like this dish. It’s a little bit salty and a little bit spicy.”
Me: “YOU’RE a little bit salty and a little bit spicy.”

Scenario:  He bursts in the door, home from his evening bike commute.
Him: “There is the most awesome sunset outside right now! Did you see it?”
Me: “YOU’RE an awesome sunset, and I see YOU.”

Our kids roll their eyes a bit, but even they get in on the act sometimes.  (“I knew you were going to say I was a really unusual car!”)

Our book, "How to Save Your Marriage, One Snarky Comment at a Time," will be out next summer and promises to tear up the bestseller list. In the meantime, you can try this strategy in the privacy of your own home and see if it isn't too much fun.

Happy Anniversary, my love! YOU'RE too much fun.  


Katey said...

This is hilarious!!! Know why? Scott and I have our own variation of your game. It goes something like this:
Scott: That's a beautiful statue.
Me: Oh, honey... you're MY beautiful statue :-)

TV announcer: This is a door-buster sale!
Me: Darling, you're MY door-buster sale :-)
Gotta do what you gotta do to keep things fun, right?

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, Dear cousin and cousin-in-law! I remember your wedding very fondly, and am thrilled that no threats have had to be carried out ;-)

Sarah Chappelle said...

All I have to add is one big "awwwwwwwww. . . ."! :)

Amy Tague said...

LOVE it!! We have been using the "your FACE" version.

Me: Dinner's going to be a little late tonight.
Jonah: Your FACE is going to be a little late tonight.

Jonah: I love this show!
Me: I love your FACE.

Me: Hannah Diller's blog is AWESOME!!
Jonah: Your FACE is awesome.

Jenny said...

Happy Anniversary, Dillers!

Raji P. said...

Happy Anniversary!! May you have many more happy, crazy, laughter-filled years together.

PS: all of you are wonderfully nuts! How did you all come up with a variation of that game? I have never heard of such lovely silliness. :)

Anna said...

Ya'll are too cute. Happy Anniversary! :)

Molly said...

that is the funniest thing i've heard today. or for a few days. that's a funny thing. no, you're a funny thing! i think i found a new spice to add to our (almost) twelve year old stew.

and i'm down right impressed that you can spell "edjamicated". i'll bet you learned that by homeschooling :)

Galex said...

Thanks! That was uplifting.

JoAnn said...

Hannah, I agree with every word! After nearly 43 years of marriage, we are still working on maintaining a healthy, loving and fun relationship. I have to admit that your FIL is better at the fun part than I am, but he remains attracted nevertheless. It has been a joy to watch you both grow in your marriage and your spiritual life. And you are great parents, so keep on enjoying, struggling, learning and growing.... someday you will gain the coveted reward of a quiver full of grandchildren, as we have.
Your loving MIL

Amy said...

That game can also be really fun if you change it to "Your mama's a..."

Happy Anniversary!

Blue Yonder said...

Y'all are just too dang cute. Happy 13th years, and here's to many more together!

Saints and Spinners said...

It's uncanny how a number of us do a variation of the "You're a..." game. We have a sillier one, too, and I'm a bit embarrassed to share it here, but it has to do with rhymes.

Happy Anniversary!

Vanessa said...

If I had read your blog earlier this week I would have congratulated you sooner. Happy 13 years of love and snarky remarks and good laughs!

My eyebrows are no longer raised :)

Beck said...

That is some fine marital advice right there ("YOU are some fine marital advice." Did I do it right?)

And look how cute you guys were! AWWW!

Stephanie said...

Our version:

Me, on a muggy central Texas afternoon: I'm so hot!
Him: I KNOW you're hot!

Which typically annoys me, but now I will view it as the snarky marriage saving comment that it is.